The last few of months have been hell for me!
It seems like the only times I blog is when things turn black... but its a way to get my thoughts out and on paper... if you know what I mean.
My husband told me on the 8 the of august that he is trans gendered and would like to become the woman he thinks he has always been inside!
...OK end the ten minute silence...
My husband is now my soon to be ex and we will remain friends but as you can imagine it has not been a easy time for me. I have had to deal with seeing him in full dress with makeup and though I know the process is a long one I don't think i will ever be ready for it to happen! Michelle(my ex chose this name when he was 10) is a good father and will remain a good parent to Triston, I just hope my son will come through this unharmed (though i don't know if that's realistic as children are cruel when very young) How do I one day explain to him that his father no longer wanted to be a dad, husband, man! Will he be able to cope with it all! He is still very young and will be OK for the time being ... But what happens when he goes to school and the other children hear about his dad who is now like a aunt to him, for he only has one mom...ME... I will support where I can but draw the line there my son will not call Michelle mom, over my dead body!!!
I have so much anger and I am dealing with it with the help of a great doc! But I feel more pity than hate for Michelle, I know it might not have been a choice to be who and how she/he is but I do feel it was a choice to marry me and have a child together... but you know how they say hind site is 20/20.
I see it this way I can hate and feel sorry for myself all I want but that will only make me a bitter person! Or I can support a friend who is going through a hard time... and feel that I'm doing the right and descent thing! I make the CHOICE not to be bitter or hateful. And I know through doing that I become a better person and parent to my son...
OK byee for now... or till the next episode of my soap opera life begins.
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2 comments:
LOL @ "my soap-opera life"!!
I'm glad you're dealing with everything in such a positive way, just think about it.... it could have been worse... he could have told you that he is now going to date your brother!
Anyways, you should write more. Hoping you have a wonderful day!
Good heavens that's a difficult one. Just when I thought all blogs are more or less the same (mine included), along comes this one. I feel for you and hope you and 'michele' can come to some kind of arrangement / agreement that is best for your little boy.
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